power? high posts?

i used to love power and high posts,
but at times,
things would just turn out to be the opposite...

at times,
how i wish i'm not the head but a nobody,
where i'll not offend anyone in order to stand up for my side,
where i'll not need to scrap my head out to think of a way to satisfy everyone,
where i'll not need to think of so many solutions and talking ways in order to make my stand clear and understanding,
where i'll not be miserable and fed up with dealing with confused minds and making up conflicting decisions...

if i were a nobody,
i'll just have to take people's orders and do like as said,
i'll just have to suit with other people and mumble disapproval in my heart,
i'll just have to fool around my day as usual and enjoy my holiday,
i'll just have to put my mind on my holiday activities without giving any single thought to school stuff...

just IF i'm a nobody...

but still,
i love power and high posts so much,
can i fight against myself?
and most important of all,
can the reality be changed?

NO.